You mean to tell me this joke was actually based in reality? It obviously seemed too ridiculous to not be a South Park joke.
The majority of South Park jokes are firmly planted in reality. Their writing staff is brilliant.
If only today there was a rotund asshole that had people follow him around, then he farts in their mouths…ohh wait
Yeps. It is part of the Messianic prophecies that come from the parts of the OT that deal with the temple. Really try to make this short
There was a prophet who said the David line would rule forever and eventually would build a third temple after the second would fall. The second fell and so far there hasn’t been a third. The original temple sought a perfect red haired cow for their rituals. So by religious logic all people have to do is find a red cow and it’s time to rebuild the temple. But wait what about David? Ok well Paul said Jesus was of the David line and that he was king. That means anyone following Jesus is following the orders of the king of the David line. Therefore to be a good Christian you should go get a red cow and convince all the Jews to go to Israel so they can die in combat.
Oh and I forgot how they worked it out in terms of weird logic but the person who would find the cow is supposed to be not-jewish for some reason.
Religion, it really is this stupid and horrible.
Oh my fucking god i didn’t realize they weren’t just making shit up for a bit. Reality is so fucking stupid.
TL;DR: crazy evangelical crap
Technically Religious crap not Evangelical. Evangelical refers to a specific subset of Christians, but this particular insanity is a joint Jewish/Christian operation (and primarily driven by the Jewish in this case).
Given all the crazy shit religious people believe this barely even moves the needle sadly. I am not in the least bit surprised. It’s also why a bunch of Fundies actually supported ISIS because they thought that would check off one of the marks on their apocalypse bingo card. Complete nutters the lot of them.
🤦♂️
Someone call Van Halen!