I don't think you're understanding my point. Trans-ness is, for me, defined by gender dysphoria. Gender dysphoria, by its very definition, is the pain i experience by not looking like a cis woman. Visibility is not a thing i want to celebrate. Visibility is the affliction.

Can everyone be stealth? No, absolutely not, and being trans should be normalized. But i still feel very uncomfortable with my debilitating endocrine disorder being used as a point of pride, in the same way gay pride is.

I'm gay, and I'm out and proud of that. I love being visibly gay. But being trans is different because it's not a thing i want to be.

So that trans youth growing up see trans adults in their community

When i was a teenager back in the early 00s, i went to a trans support group. It largely consisted of older transitioners, age 50+, who were not living good lives, through no fault of their own. But it was a very dark experience for me. I expected that my life would play out like theirs, and i would join the 41% club. I never thought that I'd get to experience just being a regular girl, and that part still seems surreal a decade later.

This is a common experience for young trans people seeking support. This is "trans visibility" and it harmed me profoundly. What would've been really nice back then were successful role models who make their trans-ness an incidental detail. We have those now, and they're not what I'd call "visible" to cis people, although they don't hide who they are.

so that trans adults see older trans people.

I'm still waiting to find older rolemodels. Most of us are really sad when we get older. I don't know how similar this is to the general lgbt population, but I'm concerned. My goal is to build a little family, and then just live a quiet life and keep each other close.

Hi trashgirlfriend, your username is cute, will you marry me so we can have a short, toxic marriage with lots of good sex and domestic violence?

That was my immediate thought. This is obviously the output of an LLM.

Prompt: "list the ways the 1% (or the most affluent and powerful segment of society) is actively preventing true ownership of the things we buy"

Lmao that's a really good analogy. If i had extra nipples, i wouldn't want "extra nipples day of visibility" but i also wouldn't want anyone to make a big deal about me taking my shirt off at the beach.

"We can disappear into the world and continue to live in the shadows," he says. "But ultimately, that's not how it's supposed to be."

Ugh. I really wish people would quit saying this. I don't want "visibility." "Trans visibility" feels like an insult. I want to be invisible, and anything less is torment. Some people will never pass as the gender they identify with, but for them to prescribe their feelings on all of us is not fair.

I haven't bought a house yet. Been house shopping for about 4 months trying to find something in my budget. I drive a beat up old Honda Civic.

Portland, OR. My budget realistically maxes out around 600k, and so far at that price all i can find are weird houses from 100 years ago with various flaws or in bad neighborhoods. Good houses seem to start around 750k.

I once thought that if i could ever make six figures, I'd be set for life. I could have anything i wanted. Now i make multiple times that number and i can still barely afford a house that's big enough for my family of 3. I'm house poor and an emergency could bankrupt me in an instant. I'm in the top like 0.1% of income earners. What the fuck?

it wasn’t rape-rape

It almost never is. Reminds me of that one scene in Bottoms. "Gray area stuff counts too."

You're missing the point. At a right turn, traffic is coming from the left and pedestrians are coming from the right. You focus left to make sure traffic is clear and then go, meanwhile a pedestrian has entered the intersection from the right and you don't notice them.

Not seeing this as charismatic is a lack of imagination. He didn't win elections by being senile or whatever. I wish i could command a room like this. This kind of media attention is exactly why he won the first time.

I used to smoke. Roommate and i quit at the same time and kept each other honest. It worked out really well and we're both still grateful to each other a decade later.

Am i the only developer who actually knows how to use an editor and solves problems that are more complicated than a typo? Was this meme written by someone who just graduated from a scam coding bootcamp?

Here in the Pacific Northwest, the vast majority of people under 50 seem to be in polyamorous relationships. I'm fairly new to poly, but I've done a lot of reading and therapy, and it's working out pretty well for me.

I do tend to be people's anchor partner, so I've admittedly never experienced the pain that comes from being a secondary when you wish you were a primary. My anchor partner tends more towards relationship anarchy and doesn't like hierarchical relationships, but i made it clear that my expectation is to be the priority in her life. We've made it work, although it takes a lot of communication.

The invisibility problem is real and frustrating. People have this image in their head of trans women being caricatures of women because their only exposure to trans women is sensationalized headlines showing unflattering pictures of trans women, or people who are very visible because they're early in transition, (or in the case of repressed conservative men, trans porn). The ones who just look like cis women are invisible, and so no one knows they exist.

I got medboarded out after a suicide attempt related to being trans in the military under DADT. At least i didn't get OTH, although I'm still not eligible for a VA home loan.

This is part of a slow trend towards powerful people dressing casually to differentiate themselves from the less powerful people who work for them. Historically, trends like this have been set by the elite and are then emulated by people trying to convince others that they are elite. This is the beginning of the end of formal wear in the United States. Soon a suit will mean "i work at a hotel".

A decade ago working at a retail store. My manager told me in a private meeting that i was expendable and he would fire me for any excuse. It’s not like i even did anything, it was just pure, spiteful power tripping. Later on i was bitching about what an asshole he is to some coworkers, and mimed him sucking the owner’s dick. I think one of my coworkers was sleeping with him, and i guess she told him. He was crying when he fired me. I feel a little bad, but also fuck that guy.

It’s ok to use self referential slurs. They’re our words 😌