Wait, isn’t desantis the guy that ate pudding with his fingers? I think Cruz is mostly famous for fleeing to Cancun when things got ugly at home

Don’t forget about guns

Those don’t seem to work for me. I think it’s because they started using an artificial sweetener that gives me equal or worse digestive issues

We mix ketchup and Worcestershire and put it on meatloaf. And then we make more to dip the meatloaf in while eating.

You’re not supposed to measure top to top to bottom

I sometimes make a cup of warm water that I add instant decaf coffee to. We’re like twins

I’ve been playing off and on for years, but can’t get past about level 20. I suck so bad at the game but love it

I think it’s because of how tiny the wound is. He doesn’t want to let on how minor his injury is

Hate to tell you but aluminum cans are plastic lined. That’s why beer doesn’t taste as bad as it used to in cans

I have had pretty good luck with doing

High five Up high Down low Too slow

My nephew would just let me do it forever, always trying to beat me on the too slow bit.

Isn’t it way more deadly than covid? Maybe that’ll be reason enough to scare idiots into compliance?

I have a friend that claims climate change is not man made. He always talks about volcanos and ice ages. Does anyone know what evidence I can actually hand him to show him man’s contribution is the leading cause?

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I know I’m just an anecdote but Netflix had some ridiculous deal where I paid $75 for a year of Starz and I got Netflix for free. So they got to pretend like they didn’t lose me when in reality I was imminently going to quit due to the password crackdown.

You just triggered a thought that 12 people now have to say they’re Trump’s peer

I think a lot of young teens will just vote how their parents tell them unfortunately. And we’re breeding dumber and dumber kids by cutting education anyway possible in Southern states, so they’ll just pile on the maga wagon

Unfortunately, he doesn’t need the votes in November he just needs the electors to say he won. He can claim fraud again when he loses

I’m too cheap to throw it out. So my role in the house is to eat all the leftovers before they go bad

Didn’t he just promise to free all of his imprisoned idiots? I’m sure he’ll get right on that

Can we just set up a fake White House with a cell phone that tweets to dead air and tell him he won?