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Cake day: August 3rd, 2023

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  • Back on early ChatGPT I asked it to write me instructions on how to change a tire in the style of a Trump speech. Output was pretty good.

    Look, folks, I’m gonna tell you how to change a tire, and nobody knows how to change a tire better than me, believe me! First, find a great spot, a tremendous spot, a spot where winners change their tires. You’re gonna need a jack, a beautiful jack, the best jack, okay? You put that jack under the car, right near the flat tire, and you pump it up, you pump it up bigly! We’re gonna raise that car, just like we’re raising this country, folks!

    Now, get yourself a lug wrench, a fantastic wrench, a winner’s wrench. You’re gonna loosen those nuts, those lousy nuts, lefty loosey, righty tighty, that’s how it goes, okay? Unscrew 'em all, but don’t let 'em get away, folks. Keep 'em close, keep 'em close to you, just like we keep our jobs close to America! Take off that flat tire, a pathetic tire, a loser tire, and put on the spare. You gotta have a spare, a magnificent spare, a spare that’s gonna make your car great again!

    Now, screw those nuts back on, folks. Screw 'em on tight, tight like our borders, okay? We don’t want 'em coming off, we don’t want 'em running away like crooked politicians. Lower that car with the jack, easy, easy, just like we’re lowering taxes, lowering 'em for the hardworking people! Finally, tighten those nuts again, extra tight, tighter than anyone has ever tightened nuts before. That tire is gonna stay put, folks, it’s gonna stay put like I’m gonna stay put in the hearts of the American people!

    That’s it, folks, you’ve changed that tire, and you’ve changed it beautifully, believe me. Nobody changes tires like we do, nobody! Now, get out there, drive with pride, and remember, we’re gonna keep winning, winning like never before!