I know you’re joking but you basically just suggested buying a pack of frozen mixed veggies so you can pick out and use only the carrots for your stew, and the idea of someone actually doing that sends my brain into a tailspin

This is top-tier, well done

How is this substantively different from the original comment?

I love how half of these are just “don’t be fucking annoying”

it is the Ten Commandments’ "historical significance, which is simply one of many documents that display the history of our country and foundation of our legal system.”

Alright, so let’s put them up right next to the Hammurabi Code, which is also majorly significant to history and our legal system. Maybe highlight the part about how Hammurabi was chosen by the Babylonian gods as the ultimate arbiter of justice.

The solution to this isn’t ostracizing trans people, it’s teaching children not be disgusting perpetrators of sexual harassment like you and many you knew.

I don’t think you need to care about money more than anything else to realize that avoiding a potential lawsuit from a notoriously litigious and powerful company is a wise decision

The author’s argument actually seems pretry flimsy to me. If the issue is that it’s cruel to make a prisoner an active participant in their own execution, you could easily resolve that by putting them to sleep before applying the nitrogen. Breathing is only voluntary as long as you’re awake; once you’re asleep, you’re no more in control of breathing the nitrogen as you are in control of your heart pumping a lethal injection throughout your body.

My coworker flips his shit every time I include a ternary operator in a PR. He also insists on refactoring any block of code longer than two lines into its own function, even when it’s only used once.

He is not well liked.

I’ve been waiting for this permission slip all my life

I would much rather have a golden retriever as my president

Attitudes like this honestly piss me off more than conservatives. You didn’t get the options you wanted, so you decided to just give up, take your ball, and go home. Grow the hell up. We don’t quit just because shit looks bleak, we keep on pushing until we can see the sun poking through the clouds, because that is the only way we will ever see it. If we give in to despair now, we will never get there. Even if it seems pointless, or like things aren’t getting better, I can guarantee you it can always, ALWAYS be worse. And THAT is your reason to vote.

I’m sorry if that reason isn’t as optimistic as you were hoping for, but that’s the reality that we live in. And it will never get better if we just bitch about unfairness and bury our heads in the sand. If we want things to get better, we need to make them better. And that starts with you. Please, be better than this. I know you have it in you.

My favorites are flesh fries

The juxtaposition of the fourth and fifth paragraphs here really threw me for a loop

I can't imagine a world in which calling a bird a "tit" in the first place was not the product of a poorly thought out public poll

I just threw up in my mouth a little

This is art

If they're getting death threats just for not backing Gym, imagine what would happen if they turned around and voted for a Democrat

Had the same thought. We got Roy Cooper here in NC as well

This is a valid point, but to be fair, the majority of Americans didn't vote for Donald Trump