God this twerp needs a wedgie, like full on cartoonish over the head flailing about in the halls wedgie

Increasing social security taxes would be very unpopular, increasing the age for retirement would be very unpopular. There’s no way to reduce the amount of money social security costs without pissing a lot of people off.

The obvious solution to the problem is to make more citizens out of people who want to work here and benefit from everything our taxes pay for. Even aside from how much they would be paid (which should be a fair honest wage) the taxes off the top would go up faster than social security costs as long as people kept coming in and costs stayed stagnant

Or aerosolized cooking oil if the house is open enough or possibly vape residue if they vape at all

I had the same thought for a while, then I started playing dnd and subsequently DMing. Now any extra mental bandwidth I did have goes to solving open-ended people problems my players give me while we’re playing.

Side benefit is I’ve felt more empathetic and patient with people since starting because I have to constantly put myself in a character’s head when we’re role-playing. I imagine that makes one seem more personable and cool to be around possibly helping with the unemployment too

Fell off the stage during a fight scene at 85. What a mensch

Sounds like somebody hasn’t gotten laid in a few decades

Sentencing is July 11th, we’ll know tomorrow

Dnd sessions, always fun to have props

Hey friend I’m a cobbler that does those kind of lifts all the time. I use a contact cement that is removed with acetone but acetone along with isopropyl alcohol can melt the material that some soles are made from so be careful. Aside from that practicing your moonwalk on the pavement outside with them on will help plenty with the stickiness if it’s just the adhesive on there that’s the problem

Conservative politics specifically exclude potential customers, no business that actually wants to make money that isn’t being artificially sustained can exist like that

Humans will break anything and everything that we use regardless of size shape or function just depends on how fast. Long as every piece is replaceable and repairable then it doesn’t matter if it breaks

You don’t get to be mad because being a runt isn’t a protected class asshole

O Fortuna starts playing

The oligarchs need more time to monopolize the market. Can’t have folks growing their own plants when there’s money to be made now

/s because internet

I’d consider an all out assault on women’s rights pretty fucking nasty

Nooo

By a lot of shit you mean a hoard of domestic employees that he definitely thought of as his slaves then yeah he went through a lot. He’s never been meaningfully told, “no you can’t have your way” by anyone

“On this episode of Storage Wars…”

Ever wonder where the phrase “government cheese” comes from?

Help the Onion is leaking into reality again