This question is especially for those who have used or are using online dating to meet new people, form relationships, hook up, etc. How do y’all balance the (online) dating scene with your own level of concern regarding privacy/security?
For example, some of these concerns may be that many dating apps are owned by a few companies, dating apps sometimes require linking to sensitive information (real phone number, google accounts, pictures, …), or that they can have vary intrusive trackers, etc
What are the steps you have made to address these concerns, if you have them? Or what are the compromises you have made? How successful are these attempts?
Let me start sharing first (in broad-stroke) about my personal experience. I’m mostly concerned with how my data are handled, transferred between, and used by different services. My concerns usually make using these apps much harder, sometimes even impossible, for example I’m hesitant to share my real phone number to sign up, and I’d prefer to limit my gmail use when possible. But that has also limited my opportunity to meet people online. Though honestly, such interactions have not been meaningful.
I’ve stopped for a while now but thinking of getting back. Just want some perspective on whether it’s worth it, and how I should orient myself with the tradeoffs.
There is no being private in online dating, it defeats the whole point. Sure, you can use an email alias, maybe even a burner number, isolate the app in another profile and so on.
But at the end of the day, it’s still you you’re putting out there.
You’re using gmail, you’re already screwed, might as well get laid too. But seriously, look into alias providers like simplelogin and anonaddy, it works for this use case and can smooth the transition away from gmail in the future. At the end of the day you need to make contact with potentials so it can’t be truly private, plus they’ll be mining your data, combining it with facebook shadow profiles etc, it’s technically quite plausible to identify you from that alone. VoIP, aliases and so forth are band-aids. At the end of the day you need to make a choice, is the potential of finding someone worth more than some of your privacy ? Or…
Consider local hobby groups, hiking, meet-ups and so forth. The so called ‘Third Place’ (other than work and home) is on it’s last legs, but it’s not dead and will hopefully see a resurgence, find and partake in one. Put yourself out there.
I don’t. Having a photo of my face posted online is off-limits already, but it’s on the other level of dangerous when it’s in a place full of horny men. ESPECIALLY when you don’t even look like an adult, it creates a whole other level of creepy. No thanks.
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